What We Do in the Shadows Season 3 Episode 5 Review: The Judgment Chamber
We have to ask ourselves if Shaun really got over the headaches of last season. It seems a little too open to too much, and it could be post-double-hypnosis trauma. In “The Casino” it looks like he’s just having a gambling problem. He drops everything he’s got, and when Laszlo bets his losses, Shaun always puts everything on one number at a roulette game.
This week, during “The Boys Only Night”, Shaun steals the disappointing thunder from the great psychic vampire himself, Colin Robinson. What could be more breathtaking than a garage full of Guy Pillows? It’s an imitation of a brand that has kept people awake for years. It’s a good thing Laszlo doesn’t use a pillow, he’s far from ready to be woken up, even though he’s wearing an old lady’s wig in court.
“The Judgment Chamber” unevenly balances the scales of justice between the human world and the vampire world, for there is a vampire in every unwarranted process. As Laszlo tips the scales in favor of the wrong party at Guy Pillow’s sleep party, he bites more than he can chew at Vampire Court. Nandor and Nadja, with human Guillermo whispering in the hot seat, debate the fate of the stray leeches. It’s pretty much a draw. Convinced to grant clemency to a vampire, who was selling fake pills supposed to protect vampires from the sun, the next must die a gruesome death. The only fate that would be worse would be to sell The Guy Pillows door-to-door, which is too much for even Shaun, who is being sued for it.
The human court is the small claims court, but for Laszlo there are no small claims, only large entries. The age-old vampire remembers, in his far too distant past, that he was some sort of lawyer, at least he had been trained in the laws of the law. What makes it all so real is how he came to this knowledge: out of necessity. He had to defend himself many times, usually on some sort of obscenity charge. When Nadja later congratulates Laszlo on his first victory in court, we realize that he has lost all of those historic cases. Why this is not surprising is somewhat surprising. Laszlo also thought that “boys’ night” meant a fool. But it looks like Laszlo is dooming Derek to a life with Laszlo. While the former Mosquito Club member may represent a new low in vampire stupidity, I’d like to see Laszlo in a hot topic.
The “fucking guide” bit is classic. It is a line that only Nandor can deliver. “Fuck Guys” is almost his catchphrase on the show, and the twist on it is something that wouldn’t be out of place in a 1980s TV sitcom. What sets it apart is the language. It sounds similar, albeit opposite, comedic deliveries, which South Park mines by beep, but the nonchalance of the transposition accompanies you. It’s like changing your name from the horribly loathsome Jennifer to the horribly loathsome Gabby, the little things make all the difference.
“Do whatever you want, that will be the whole of the law,” HR advises the vampires. It’s good for team cohesion. Everything takes place in the bedrooms, but usually on Thursdays as it is tiring to keep up with all week. Colin really should make an appearance. He’s certainly not getting any satisfaction tonight. The creaky, squeaky withdrawal from the throne would at least have provided a quick lift to the anguish-hungry vampire. Colin’s Miss Honeycrunch Mystery game gets hijacked, he’s quickly demoted from window to door when the game is on TV, and he never gets the closure of a firing story. Even his squeaky, fake Yoda thing only gets a “it’s funny” from Laszlo. The psychic vampire has been drinking voids for a few episodes now. It should be part of the preparations for the closing birthday parties.